I know I haven't written a postpartum post in a while. Promise I will soon. This postpartum phase, which truly lasts a year, is challenging to say the least. Each time you think you've got it figured out, something major changes and you've got new puzzles to solve. That said, on the days where you feel like you may have just got it figured out, there is no better feeling than enjoying these early days, weeks, months of your new life with a new baby and a new you.
For me, around 3 months things started to get more and more challenging for me. The deep fatigue set in, Avital began to act out more, Bar was still up all night and nursing all day, and Richie began to feel neglected as well. I was being stretched way too thin in way too many directions and it was weighing on my health and sanity.
I wouldn't go so far as to say I was in a dark place, but things were certainly grey. It was tough to see the light at the end and I was getting a little sad about everything, feeling fuzzy and unfocused. Luckily, on one of these rare, but amazing warm winter days we've been blessed with this season, I had a moment of clarity and decided that I needed more yoga in my life. I figured it would give me more me time, more flexibility, more openness, more good stuff all around.
I signed up for a handful of mommy and baby classes and made it a point not to miss a class. I was waaaaaaaay out of shape and tight in all the wrong places so my practice was nothing short of ugly. Nonetheless, I dragged my tush to yoga three days a week and did some dvd's on my off days.
At the playspace where I was practicing (Frolic), there was a prenatal class that they scheduled which no one was showing up for. To my luck, they offered it to me as a mommy and baby and I happened upon Flo Cabre-Andrews! It was an uh-mazing practice. Exactly the right amount of push and pull so to speak and I knew I needed more. I attended a couple weeks of that class before I approached her to do some privates. She was happy to oblige and in no time at all I was up to three practices a week with her!
She teaches me an anusara style yoga which resonates deeply with my body. On days when I'm feeling fatigued, it leaves me feeling energized. On days when I'm feeling good, it leaves me appropriately fatigued;)
Most importantly, Flo and anusara have left me motivated, inspired, open, stronger than ever before, humbled, and most most importantly: sane. The work we've been doing has helped me be a better mom, wife, friend, person! It's helped me slow down and take the time to think and breathe. It's given my physical strength to carry the baby and set her down with more steadiness and stability. It's given me the mental strength to do the incredibly arduous work it takes to be a mom and wife.
I am infinitely grateful to both Flo and yoga for lending me the tools I need to be the best me I can be in this oh so testing time in my life.