Positivity Begets Positive Energy

Me and Jonny

Me and Jonny Today is a day I needed to search for the positive.  I needed to keep trying to find it because the world felt heavy.  Things seemed to be working against me.  I was tired.

We started the day way to early.  In the middle of the night actually.  I was up twice with the dog and once with Bar before she decided to come into our bed at 4am.  I didn't get much sleep between then and the hour Richie gave me a 7a.

That hour made us all late for our days.  Both girls late to school.  It was Bar's first day.  Traffic on the way to SoulCycle.  No spots and the garage was closed.  I walked into my most important and necessary class of the week 6 minutes late.  That class though put me back on a better energy level.  Then rush to shower and pick up Avi from school.  I had exactly an hour with her to spend some "special time".  Sushi and candy.  Candy for her and of course Bar, but most importantly my friend Conor who had surgery yesterday.  Spending some time with him was on the list for later.  Then a conference with her Kindergarten teacher.  Her then me.  Drop her off.  Speed to Conor's.  Quality time with him while he's laid up in bed.  Rush home for dinner to find that Richie has decided to stay in the city with friends.  Hence last minute alone evening with two kids (one extremely cranky from no sleep), our dog Sophie (the easiest of the bunch), and a very very brand new puppy who needs to go out every 20 minutes.

Bar needed to be held most of the night.  As does puppy Ellie since we're trying to avoid accidents in the house.  Bedtime came late because no one wanted to go.  Finally I put Bar to bed, the puppy in her crate, and started to read the first out of two books to Avi when I hear Bar screaming at the top of her lungs.  I mean really wailing.  I give it time, maybe she'll lie back down and drink her bottle and fall asleep.  No luck though.  In fact the puppy hears Bar and starts crying.  So I have a screaming 2 year old, a crying 8 week old puppy, and Avi telling me to keep reading.  She just cannot go to sleep without me reading to her and then lying with her.

Bedtime took an hour and a half.  Writing this post I realize there is a long list of other things I should be doing.  Filling out forms for Avi's school, getting the puppy's papers in order, getting all our bags ready for the morning, music research, responding to emails, emptying boxes, organizing my home, laundry...

And all of that is overwhelming alone.  But with the weight of Jonny gone it feels like just too much.  So I ignore whatever I can afford to for the minute.  Procrastinate.  And blog.

Thank you all for listening.  Thank you all for the amazing emails and love you've sent my way in so many different forms.  Thank each and every one of you who sees me and asks how I'm doing and then immediately recognizes how difficult a question that is to answer.  Thank you.

A Thank You, Gratitude, & Positivity

You'll have to excuse my amateurness in that video, it was my first!  I did though, want to say thank you in "person" to all of you who have written me.  I love love hearing from you guys and always want to keep the line open between us.

Gratitude is a huge part of my daily thought cycle.  I try to remind myself as often as possible how lucky I am for this life I've been given.  Every day (tough or easy) is a blessing and I'm so grateful the opportunities life brings me. Each and every yoga class, my teacher Flo, takes a few seconds to talk about being grateful and dedicating our practice.  And while it's a big part of my own daily thoughts, the reminders are so incredibly beautiful and inspiring.

I believe pretty strongly in the power of positivity.  Only you can make your life and any life from any vantage point can be seen as good or bad, so it's up to you to put it in the right perspective, shed the light on it, love what you have.

Some days, weeks, months, this proves more challenging than others, but I find, every time, that when I put the right energy out there, the universe sends it back.

Since I've started writing regularly again and putting my energies towards this blog and the community that surrounds it, I've found that more and more doors have been opening for me.  There was a point, not too long ago, where writing regularly was out of my reach, but as soon as I made the space in my life, the time in my day, I've found that it's paid off tenfold.

Hearing from you all is what makes this all worth it.  Knowing that this information is being shared kindly and powerfully is so motivating.  So thank you all for the energy and strength that's been renewed in me.  I know in my heart of hearts that it can only bring beautiful things!